Follow Your Heart

Over Exposed

2009-10-18T19:22:00.000-07:00

This what happened what I put too much time on indoor photography - I forgot how to properly exposed in a direct sunlight situation.

It was set with F2.8 in a bright direct sunlight, and it got stuck with 1/200 shutter speed because I was trying to use the fill-in flash. Now I know why Ken Rockwell prefer D40 due to it's 1/500 flash sync.

No Flash, No Problem

2009-10-15T02:08:00.001-07:00

Our office is having a special lunch today, and I don't feel like bringing even my small flash gun. I rely solely on my 35mm 1.8 lens.

Amazing, at ISO 900 (F3.2, 1/30) the photo above still looks stunning, I don't see any noise at all.

How I end up buying Taylor Swift CD

2009-09-06T22:40:00.000-07:00

I stopped updating myself with new songs and music few years ago when I got myself busy with other things such as studies and research. Until now I don't even know what's the latest news on music, Top 10, Billboard 100 etc. Back then (even now, sometimes) , whenever I feel like listening to music, I usually grab my old CD, Bryan Adams, Bon Jovi, Michele Branch, The Corrs etc.

It's only few weeks backs when I got the chance to watch Hanna Montana The Movie (I've never even watched the series before!) that I discover Taylor Swift. I always love a woman singer who can play guitar and sing at the same time (I just love Michele Branch) . Later I found out from the internet that she also wrote and compose her own song. So I decided, I gotta listened to all of her songs!

I downloaded few of her MP3 from the internet, and I love it the minute I listened to it. Few days ago I bought her new album, Fearless and I think it's a great and wonderful album. She's beautiful, has a lovely voice and very talented. You won't regret it, go buy her CD.

Photo Event - Workshop for Islamic Writing

2009-07-06T19:20:00.000-07:00

From Majalah I Album

I'm using the small and superb Nikon SB400 which is good enough for this small event ina small room which consist of no more than 50 people. If the event was to be held in a more larger room or hall, I might have to buy the SB600 instead.

Unfortunately, when not done correctly the SB400 gave a poor result, such as below.

From Majalah I Album

The small room above is actually poorly lit, hence the my small bouncing flash unable to bounce enough light when not directed correctly.

I hate needing to buy a new flash, because as of now I have never need a bigger flash, and I did not foresee the need to to so yet.

Sample AF-S 35mm

2009-05-26T07:09:00.000-07:00

35mm, F2, 1/100S, No-Flash

This photo was taken inside KLCC shopping center using my new AF-S 35mm lens, I really love the result. Unless I'm taking photo of my son during his sports day or some kind of activity where I need a zoom, I will always leave my new AF-S 35mm lens glued to my D60.

My new lense AF-S 35mm F1.8

2009-05-12T19:16:00.001-07:00

In the beginning I was gonna opt for the AF-S 50mm, but it was quite expensive for me since I'm not a serious photographer anyway. I also realized that I rarely take portrait shot, instead I often shot candid and group photos.

Ken Rockwell did a marvelous review here.

Now a day, I only carrying my D60 with this lens glued to it. Unless I need a wide setting or zoom, will I took my kit lens along, which I rarely do. I'll post some shot with my new lens soon.

Beautiful Flowers

2009-02-02T23:51:00.000-08:00

I spent my Chinese New Year break by visiting my parents in law, in mersing, Johore. My mother in law loves to grow flowers around her garden. Seeing that I love making photos, she insisted that I capture some of the beautiful flowers on her garden. So here they are:

Sorry I forgot to get their names from my mother in law, so it's like you enjoying watching beautiful models without knowing any of their names.

The shahid (martyr) children of Palestine

2009-01-05T20:54:00.000-08:00

Children of the Heaven

A Palestinian man grieving in front of the bodies of three children, one of them is his son, killed by an Israeli tank yesterday.

Flash tips - no bounce

2008-12-22T17:03:00.000-08:00

Last week I went to a wedding function in Kedah, northern of Malaysia. I was very happy because I will be able to test my photography skill for a wedding which is done is a big hall.

In the beginning, I didn't use any flash since the ceiling is too high to bounce my the light of my sb400. Then Capt. Seirra came along and asked my why didn't use the flash. I told him I was afraid if the light will wash out my subject and I told him that the ceiling is too high to do a bounce.

He then advice me to just tilt the flash only a little so that the light will spread. He told me that the external flash is not used just for bouncing. Below is a sample photo that I managed to test out. I never thought the result would be outstanding, all thanx to Capt. Sierra.

Picture taken without Flash - Capt. Sierra is sitting far right

Picture taken with Flash tilt up - Thanx Capt Sierra for the tips

SB 400 tilt 45 degree

Terminal service screen lock-out

2008-12-16T22:39:00.000-08:00

Some of the users complaint to me that their terminal service session screen was locked after a few minutes. In the begging, I thought their session was logged out, so I checked their session setting. I was surprised that their these users setting are the same with the rest of other staff that are not affected by the screen lock out.

I called them up to find out what really happened, and finally understood that only the screen was locked, not the session. Unfortunately there was no option to control the screen from the administration menu. So I Google around to find some answer, and from reading a few forums the setting was set at the policy, however we never set any screen lock policy.

Oh, before I go on, you probably thought this screen lock must have come from the screen saver, right? Yes, it is, but the user terminal service was configured for it to launch a designated application (via a script) that the user have no way of altering the screen saver setting. Strange thing is, this only affected on two staff, and not the rest.

So, I called the user up to get their password, and then change the Environment setting so that session is loaded in full. Then log in remotely to the server using her id, and then change the screen saver setting (which was set to start after 1 minute after being idle).

Enjoying My SB-400

2008-12-10T06:02:00.000-08:00

I really enjoyed my new Nikon flash, the small but powerful SB-400. I would like to share some pictures that I took while I was visiting my brother in-law in his house in Nilai. I wouldn't have gotten these beautiful pictures if it weren't for the SB-400 bounce flash.

My son playing with a cat with his aunt

After seeing what a beautiful picture I made with my D60, my wife insisted that she also wants a picture with the cat and our son together LOL.

UiTM Convocation

2008-12-04T07:18:00.000-08:00

Last Tuesday I took the day off to take my family in law to the UITM convocation. My sister in law, Ummi Hani was graduating that day. Actually I'm replacing my wife because she claim that she have a really important meeting that day. Eventually I had to utilise the only leave that I have.

I never expected that it was going to be a long and tiring day. I've always hate university convocation because of its long and stupid protocol. I don't know when will they ever change it, or they might not even bother. University folks sometimes not very smart - remember the last time some not so smart old folks defended the name Universiti Pertanian Malaysia because of it's sentimental value - rubbish!

My Family in Laws - Picasa Album: Family

My sister in law with her lecturer - Picasa Album: Family

My sister in law with her friends - Picasa Album: Family

Simple Explanation About Aperture

2008-11-23T19:27:00.000-08:00

I guess these few days/weeks/may be months!? I'll be writing more on photography and dSLR alike. Writing (more like copy and paste) will make me understand more.

Aperture is how wide the lens' iris opens. The wider it opens the more light gets in. It's exactly the same thing as the iris of your eye which opens as the light gets darker. The wider it opens for the same subject the shorter the shutter speed will be to get the correct exposure. This is because the camera chooses shutter speed based on how much light gets into the camera. A brighter subject or wider aperture lets in more light.

Big apertures have smaller numbers, like f/4. Smaller apertures have bigger numbers like f/16. These are fractions, so 1/16 is smaller than 1/4. Big apertures like f/4 will tend to have just one thing in focus. A smaller aperture like f/16 will tend to have everything in focus. How much is in focus is called depth of field.
Ref: http://www.kenrockwell.com/tech/shutteraperture.htm

The above image was captured at f/2.8 with a very shallow depth of field

An aperture of f/22 maximizes the area that is in sharp focus

(Image and explanation is courtesy of The Digital SLR Guide: Beyond Point-and-Shoot Digital Photography By Jon Canfield)

For digital photography, a lens with a maximum (largest) aperture of f2.8 is "fast," while a lens with a maximum aperture of F8 is "slow." If you take many pictures in dim light, you'll want a camera that has a "fast" lens. - Mastering Digital Photography, David D. Busch

To be able to see, not merely look

2008-11-20T06:59:00.000-08:00

To be able to see, not merely look, is the foundation of discovery - Chief Chris Johns

What Is There To Photograph?

2008-11-16T20:07:00.000-08:00

KTM Komuter - From Ibn Hussin Gallery

The train will cross the bridge every 15 to 20 minutes. So if I spoil a shoot, I would have to spend at least another 15 minutes for the next train to cross the bridge. Apparently I did spoiled one shoot.

The title of today blog actually is an introduction title from a book I'm currently reading, Nature Photography Field Guide by John Shaw. He wrote,

Each year, I travel the globe to take pictures, often leading photo tours or workshops. The people in these groups are specifically interested in photographing the natural world, yet in's on this trips that I inevitably hear the question, "What is there to photograph?"

Truly this is the wrong question to ass; it leads photographers to take pictures that are empty of emotional content. Without passionate involvement, our pictures are nothing more than records. The question we should always be asking is "What is there to discover?"

Leaded Petrol at Petronas

2008-11-04T20:29:00.000-08:00

I notice this weird scene when I stopped by the Semenyih Petronas yesterday. So what do you think wrong with the picture below?

From Ibn Hussin Blogger Pictures

Busy Week

2008-09-24T15:52:00.000-07:00

I just had two of the most busiest week of my entire life. During this two week (including this week) I'm actually busy creating new students Login ID. Each of the new student will have an AD account, complete with e-mail and home folder. Now, it'll be crazy if I have to create them one-by-one. So usually I wil be supplied with a chunk of file that hold the all of students information for me to start my task.

I will then prepared a CSV file and open up DSRazor to start importing. Problems start when the students information that I prepared on the CSV file were wrong, their Students ID and Course were all jumbled up. Fortunately it only happened to one file, where it contains about 67 number of students, and only half of them were affected. End up, those affected students came rushing to the helpdesk and me complaining their students ID and course were all wrong. * Sigh..

My Son And Sami Yusuf

2008-08-19T14:12:00.000-07:00

My four year old son is a big fan of Sami Yusuf. He would insist that the Sami Yusuf CD be played in the car everytime we go out. His favourite songs includes My Ummah, Hasbi Rabbi, Mother etc.

Actually I'm happy that he likes listening to Islamic songs, however sometimes I would also like to listen to Islamic lectures CD, especially by Dr Mohd Asri since I hardly had anytime listening to them at home. Unfortunately my son would go nuts if I ever tried to change the CD - he would scream and shout to both of us (my wife and me). I would only be able to change the CD when he goes to sleep.

No need for ITIL

2008-08-06T23:05:00.000-07:00

Few weeks ago I was supposed to attend the ITIL training. Unfortunately I wasn't able to attend the training because my son was infected by chicken pox that week, alhamdulillah he has recovered now.

Few weeks earlier, I actually armed myself with some ITIL information I got from the internet. I read some blogs and articles, all the pro and the cons. I did that so that I have some basic understanding about it before I actually go for the traning. It has also been my habit to challenge the speaker and present my own insight.

So what is ITIL?

ITIL stands for IT Information Library and it is a framework developed in Britain in the 1980s that addresses service delivery and support of IT services.

From itSMf,

ITIL provides a framework of Best Practice guidance for IT Service Management and since its creation, ITIL has grown to become the most widely accepted approach to IT Service Management in the world.

Unfortunately since I'm unable to pose any question to the speaker or at least provoke him, I would like to quote some of the interesting articles on ITIL that I found quite interesting.

Hank Marquis of itSMF actually wrote

Any reputable player in ITIL marketplace will honestly tell you not everyone needs ITIL, and those who could use ITIL don’t need every bit of it. There is nothing wrong with that, and anyone who won’t tell you this is trying to sell you something you probably don’t need.

he also said

You only need to implement those parts of ITIL you need and find appropriate

While another writer from the same forum wrotes

you do not need to know all of ITIL to get benefits from it, nor do you need to understand it all to get value. To get started with ITIL, many IT practitioners will start with existing process areas that they already have and want to improve.

I present all this not to undermine the ITIL concept or anyone associated with it, but to make it clear that it is not necessary to be ITIL compliant. All you need is just a nice model for delivering good IT services.

Memoirs of The King Of Fighters

2008-07-16T02:16:00.000-07:00

Everywhere people talk about politics, its really tiring - The news papers, TVs, Forums, Blogs and even shoutbox. I think I've had enough.

The King Of Fighters is one of the best computer games I've ever played. I think started playing it back in 1998. Back then I played using the PC emulation, since I couldn't afford the Sony Play Station (PS). My one and only playmate was my younger brother. We both loves the games very much and were both hooked.

I continuously played this game until I graduated and started working, and was afford to own a PS of my own. Now, after 5 years of marriage, I hardly play any console games anymore. Well, may be I will again when my son grows up, since now he's only 4 years old. And I believe he's also responsible for damaging my old PS, ha.. ha.

Mistake I shouldn't have made

2008-06-28T17:41:00.000-07:00

How do you like your manager to admonish you in front of other people, I don't think anybody likes that. I like the idea "One Minute Reprimands", from the One Minute Manager, a really good management and leadership book written by Kenneth Blanchard, Ph.D and Spencer Johnson, M.D.

I also like the idea that a manager should reprimand his/her staff inside the manager's room, where nobody is looking. And probably the staff might have something to say too to justify his/her action without embarassing the manager in front of everybody.

OK, so I made a - well I wouldn't consider it a huge mistake, but I have to admit it's my mistake. I forgot, I didn't plan well.

The story was, I was supposed to get two IPs (internal and public) for the Nagios server from the network team. However the procedure was that you need to fill up a form and put in some details like IP Destination, Protocols (for Public IP) etc - which I didn't have the details yet until the next evening when the vendor comes. Unfortunately when the vendor came, it was already too late. Well the rest is history.

To Err Is Human. Fortunately my manager follows the rules of One Minute Reprimand on the part - "Realize that when the reprimand is over, it’s over". So everything went back to normal, and we had a good laugh again.

I found peace here

2008-06-13T17:20:00.000-07:00

I'm so happy to be able to know some foreign muslim lectures here when I prayed at the Islamic Center with them, they are Inamul Haq and Hazem. I also met a France born Muslim (but he already hold a PR), Christopher when he called for some problem he had with his PC. I only learned that he is a Muslim when I found a Qur'an CD in the CD drive. I quickly apologize to him for not giving the proper Salam when I first entered his office. I can't wait to meet more foreign muslims here and make friends with them.

I also learned that the Islamic Center held a number of talks about Islam, and among them were Shah Kirit. I also found few good Islamic books mostly from DarusSalam publisher, Bulughul Maram by Ibn Hajar, Kitabut Tauhid by Ibn Abd Wahhab among others. There's also a number of audio CD lectures by Ustaz Rasul Dahri. "I have arrived at a salafi Islamic Centers", I said to myself and smiling with satisfaction. I can't wait to know more of these guys. Unfortunately, now is a semester break. So the Islamic Centers is very quite and I can only expect three to four of us praying together.

Father and Son, Iraqi Prisoners

2008-06-09T00:36:00.000-07:00

I received a number of sad pictures from an e-mail, however the picture above really shed my tears. It suddenly reminds me of my naughty four year old son. I am a father, and I just couldn't imagine if the above scenario were to happened to me and my son.

I then Google for some more Iraqi war victim pictures - but I just didn't the heart to show it here - 18SG.

Finally, I pray to Allah s.w.t that the suffering Iraqi (Muslims) prisoners will all be sent to heaven, and that hard punishment goes to those who deserve it. Ameen, Ya Rabb al-'Alamin.

Good Bye EON Bank

2008-05-31T16:12:00.000-07:00

It has been eight years since I start working for EON Bank back in the year 2000. I would have never expected that I would last that long. I've watched friends come and go, and come back again (tak malu.. he.. he..). And finally, it's time for me to say good bye. frankly I'm quite sad to leave EON Bank, to leave this building (Menara EON Bank, formerly known as Wisma Cycle Carri). I have many good friends here. I tried my best not make enemies, but I can't change people's heart.

I would like to take this opportunitiy to thanks all my friends for the kind cooperation all this while - and also for the nice lunch you guys treated me last week. I actually had four different lunch with different unit team. I couldn't thank you enough.

The pictures shown here are my lunch with the former OA & e-Banking team - courtesy of Daniel Ong (thanks dude). Unfortunately this team has been dissolved according to the new chart.

I will definetly miss all my friends in EON Bank. You guys will always be in my heart. I personally would like to thank Mrs Hanita and her husband Azlin for introducing me to EON Bank, and also the former system & method team - Amir, Zairi, Haslina, Chris, Lum, Eddie and not to forget Lim Sze-Sze for the support. I would also like to thank Mr Kevin and Simon for your guidence while I was in the OA team. I also like to thank Azlina for coodinating the lunch, and all the party in EON Bank including Hari Raya. My thanks also goes to zainuddin who thought me a lot about work management and for being a good companion.

Finally I would also like to thanks the AJK Surau for giving me the opportunity to serve and contribute to the surau, especially Na'im, Rosli, Haris, Bahar, and Jafari.

Well, good bye my friends, insyaAllah we will meet again.

Good Bye Kuala Lumpur

2008-05-30T16:26:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was my last day of working in Kuala Lumpur. I've been working in Kuala Lumpur since year 2000, it has been eight years now. Saying good bye doesn't mean I will never come back to Kuala Lumpur, I will of course but seldom. Maybe twice or thrice, if there's any need to.

One of the reason why I leave Kuala Lumpur is because I got fed-up with the horrible traffic jam and the incompetent motorist, yes incompetent! Malaysia drivers (and bikers) are so terrible. They are so !@#$% slow and just so !@#$% incompetent!

Another reason is that, Kuala Lumpur is quite far from my house, Bandar Bukit Mahkota, Bangi - it's 40KM! Another reason is the petrol, the tolls and the parking fee is killing me. Despite I occasionally drives to work (I ride with my wive), I still need to fill-up my bike thrice or twice a week which amount to nearly RM150 a month.

Eventhough my salary at my new work place is not as high as I expected, at least I don't have to fight my way trough the &%$#! traffic jam in Kuala Lumpur anymore. Good-Bye traffic jam!

Oh, didn't I tell you about the air pollution in Kuala Lumpur? It's so horrible, it's killing me. Smokes are everywhere! Good bye Haze and Air Pollution. Good riddance!

Prayer (solat) - Spirit Renewal

2008-05-22T14:51:00.000-07:00

Solat (solah, prayer) is actually a form of spirit renewal. As Dr Stephen R Covey mention in his popular book, 7 Habits of highly effective people

Renewing the spiritual dimension provides leadership to your life. It's highly related to Habit 2. The spiritual dimension is your core, your center, your commitment to your value system. It's a very private area of life and a supremely important one. It draws upon the sources that inspire and uplift you and tie you to the timeless truths of all humanity

I also agree with Dr Covey when he said

Spiritual renewal takes an investment of time. But it's a Quadrant II activity we don't really have time to neglect

Hence when one look at solat as a waste of time, then he is wrong. The same goes to those who prayed without full concentration (kusyuk) , one is actually wasted the opportunity of not only spirit renewal, but seeking help and guidance from Allah s.w.t.

Also please don't perform your prayer in a rush or you will not be able to fully relax your mind and get your spirit renewed.

Allah, the Exalted, says:
"Seek help in patience and As-Salat (the prayer). Truly, Allah is with As-Sabirun (the patient)." (2:153)

Panic! Where is my son?

2008-05-11T08:17:00.000-07:00

It was early in the morning, I went to the Giant Hypermarket to buy some groceries together with my son Iman Mustaqim, while my wife Jannah busy herself with the daily house chores.

Iman likes to play with the indoor playground setup by the Giant management inside the hypermarket. Beside the playground there is a small bookshop. Myself being a bookworm couldn't resist the temptation of just browsing trough some of the titles there. Actually it's not the first time I went to the bookshop, nearly every time I shop there I will take the time to drop by the small bookshop.

After leaving Iman for a few minutes I entered the bookshop and start browsing trough some titles on the self-help section. Now this is where I made my big mistake. You see, usually I had my wife to watch over my son while I was browsing. This time, being wifeless I just don't know where did I got my confidence to just leave a 4 year old boy to play by himself without his parents watching over him!

So after about 5 minutes inside the bookshop, I walkout so confident thinking that my son would still be there playing with the other kids (after all it was only for 5 minutes!). Boy how I thought wrong!

Since the indoor playground is quite huge, so the first thing I seek is my son's slipper. To my horror, it wasn't there. I didn't believe it at first, so I tried to find him on the busy and noise play ground. Confident that he wasn't there I started to shout his name a few times, but there was no reply (of course he didn't know how to reply yet, but he usually come running back to me when I call out his name)

The first thing I thought was that he could be in the toilet, since the toilet is very near to the play ground, and I once brought him there for him take a pee. Unfortunately he wasn't there, so I ran to the parking lot. I thought since I parked very near to the entrance, he might tried to find me there (he's such a smart ass you know - may Allah save him from being hit by a car).

I start to panic when he's nowhere to be found, I ran around the Shopping Mall like crazy while my eyes scanning trough every shop lot hoping he's inside in one of them. However my effort was futile, I started to praying to God that my son could be found. I could imagine a headline on the newspaper about my son missing in a shopping mall while his father busy browsing trough some books!

Finally I decided to start finding him inside the Giant supermarket. I knew it's gonna be tough since the supermarket is very huge. So I start running trough every section but he's still now where on sight. Suddenly I remembered, my son likes to visit the toys section - so I quickly went there. Alhamdulillah, there he was happily browsing trough the toys. I took him and kissed him and praised to Allah many times. I realized that he was interested on the Bugs Bunny jigsaw puzzle, so without hesitation I picked it up for him.

I will definitely remembered this lesson to never let my son out of my sight anymore. All praise to Allah for His blessing and love.

Working with Speed

2008-05-07T21:09:00.000-07:00

When you do something too fast or too quick, you will tend to make many mistakes. In the end, you will need to fix it, hence the amount of time you actually spent are about the same as when you do something more carefully (slowly). [Slow here does not mean as slow as the snail or a turtle okay.]

Speed Kills
Speed Kills - Yes and No. You might want to speed up a little when you're on a highway (I hate slow drivers, especially woman.. sorry) or in terms of efficiency like (computer) system respond time or even waiting for your food in a restaurant. However, when you're writing a paperwork, or doing routine security checking (logs, etc..) on a server or applications, writing codes (computer program) , debugging (codes), speed only makes you vulnerable to mistakes, hence wasted even more of your valuable time.

There are some task or work that need more attention, hence more time. However there are also task or work that need very little time. Operational work that need less work from your brain (thinking) should not take too much of a time to do as compare to a work that need more attention hence more work from your brain.

Bank teller handling operational counter job didn't even need to look at the number on the keyboard, and they handle customer request very fast. However a technical support executive will need more time trying to find a solution why is his application on the UNIX server stop responding every now and then - it's easier to just kill and run the script, but that won't solve the actual underlying problem. So you just keep on coming back on the problem again and again - hence wasting very large amount of time attending an old dying UNIX server.

It's Not About The Money

2008-04-08T06:32:00.000-07:00

Why are you leaving the banks that could pays you good bonus and increament?

It's not actually about the money, but I'm trying to find a job where it's near to my house (family).

Well, you could ask for a transfer to a branch near here?

I love what I'm doing now, i.e computer stuff. If I'm to be transfer to a branch, I'll be doing banking operational stuff.

Above are some of the questions I get during my recent interview with a University, situated not more than 17 KM from my house. It's true, I've been trying to find a stable job which is near to my house and alhamdulillah I finally found one. I wan't to get closer to my family, and I don't like the idea of wasting 3 hours of my time on the road, and getting home feeling so exhausted that I just want to crash.

A few days later, after I accept the offer from the University, news were flying around the bank that there will be a new adjustment to the staff salary - an increase up to 17%! So one of my collegue mock me and says "You should've wait for the adjustment before you submit the resignation letter." I grinned.

I told myself, what was my motive or objective when I started looking for a nother job? Was it for money? If it wasn't for money, why should regret my decision?

I told myself, this is one way of Allah s.w.t is testing my true intention (niat) and sincere (ikhlas).

Who's the boss? Dedicated to my wife

2008-03-24T00:28:00.000-07:00

My wife has just been elected to lead the System Support Team few months ago. Unfortunately she has to face some problem from his former collegue. The article below from Techrepublic best describe her situation

Who's the boss? Tips for managing friends and former peers

Easing into a new management role is fairly straightforward. Sure, it’s a little bit strange to delegate coding issues and bug fixes instead of handling everything yourself, but that’s not that difficult to get used to, right? If you’ve been promoted from within, however, you might be faced with the sticky issue of handling your new relationship with your former peers. How, for example, do you give a performance evaluation to someone you’ve, well, bonded with?

Stay professional
“Nothing in a performance evaluation should be difficult to discuss between two people who have a history of friendship,” said Mark Kimbell, president of Kimbell Associates LLC, a business improvement firm. “An evaluation is nothing more than a fact-based summary of issues that you should have been addressing all along anyway, so there shouldn’t be any awkward surprises.” In fact, Kimbell says, a close friendship can even lend extra credibility to your comments: You genuinely want what’s best for your friend.

It’s perfectly permissible to remain a part of your team’s social group, as long as you remember that you can’t give team members the inside scoop on what’s what with the higher-ups. If you don’t make a habit of dishing out the dirt, there won’t be any need to cut out your weekly bowling night or turn down invitations to after-hours parties. It is all right to make a passing reference—in very general terms—to business events, but any specifics should be shared only in more appropriate settings, and information should be revealed only to people who are supposed to know it.

“If you have a specific business issue to discuss with one or more of your employees, it’s fine to do that off-site,” said Kimbell, who recommends that you simply clarify the purpose of the meeting beforehand and include only the specific individuals affected by what you have to say.

You need to remember that your true friends won’t want you to compromise your professional responsibilities; they’ll want you to succeed. They won’t, therefore, put you in a situation where you’ll be forced to choose between friendship and career. As for the folks who place contingencies on your relationship—well, with friends like that, you’d better watch your back.

Kimbell cautions that you should be sure you don’t treat your friends any better or worse than anyone else on your team. “Treat them the same way you treat everyone else,” said Kimbell. “It is their responsibility as much as yours to make sure there is never the appearance that you manage your friends any differently than you manage the rest of the team.”

So what do you do if you’re doing everything right and one of your former friends just won’t give you a break? Let it go, says Kimbell. “You can’t manage someone else’s feelings.” You’ll never win over a person who resents your hard work and the promotion it earned you. Instead, focus on doing the best job you can and making your team successful and productive. If, despite your best efforts, your team member is actually disruptive to that success and productiveness, then set the “friendship” aside and let your management skills take over: Reassign or fire the employee, and find someone else who will make a positive contribution to your group.

The transition to management requires a good deal of flexibility. You’re not going to be able to please everyone. You can either kill yourself trying or concentrate on managing the majority effectively. Guess which choice is the best use of your time? Answer that correctly, and you’re already on the way to succeeding as a manager.